


Revenge on a Friend

by Jekkah



Series: Elmo Crack Fics [4]
Category: Constantine (TV), Sesame Street (TV)
Genre: Anal Sex, Crack Fic, M/M, Muppet Sex, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-03
Updated: 2016-01-03
Packaged: 2018-05-11 08:24:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5620060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jekkah/pseuds/Jekkah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I wrote this just to mess with a certain someone.  She knows who and she knows why.  Basically, it's John Constantine/Elmo crackfic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Revenge on a Friend

**Author's Note:**

> Love ya, AH! Thanks for some of the lines, even though you didn't know that I was going to use them!

Dressed in a long, brown trench coat over a white shirt, John Constantine entered the hotel room without fear or hesitation. "Elmo.”

"Hello, Connie.” Elmo didn't not move from the bed where he was lounging against the headboard.

“I prefer that you use John,” Constantine told him, dryly.

Elmo took in a deep breath. “And Elmo prefers that you not insist on using these… discount hotel.” He flicked his from the thin bedspread to Constantine. “But Elmo supposes that Elmo can handle it for a night… Connie.”

Constantine removed his jacket and tossed his tie to the side. “Maybe we should start again.”

“Elmo is very pleased that you have come,” Elmo commented in agreement. “And brought the whip. Elmo will enjoy riding Connie like Snuffaluffagus."

“I thought it was my turn to ride, love,” Constantine countered.

Rising on the bed, Elmo sauntered over to the demon hunter. “Elmo is always the cowboy. Now, strip for Elmo, little horsey.”

Quivering with anticipation, Constantine did as Elmo bid until he was standing before the fury, red muppet, naked. His slightly above-average penis stood erect between. The angry purple veins screamed out for relief already and he had yet to be touched.

“Elmo is glad to see that you have come prepared.” Elmo licked his lips as he allowed his eyes to roam up and down the man. “And Elmo is especially glad to see that you have kept the facial fuzz. Elmo loves the way it feels when Connie rubs his face against Elmo's balls. Elmo wants Connie to kneel on the bed and begin.”

Constantine cracked his neck. “Yes, sir.”

He placed one knee and then the other on the bed. He rubbed the fur between Elmo's legs until Elmo's orange, ribbed cock appeared. Constantine ran his tongue roughly over Elmo's penis.

“Blech,” Constantine spit out. “Why the fuck do you have to taste like Skittles? I do NOT want to taste the rainbow.”

“Don't worry,” Elmo patted his head, “Elmo remembered whiskey for Connie to rinse his mouth out.”

Constantine grinned. “And my Silk Cut cigarettes?”

Elmo shrugged, but tilted his head towards the desk where the whiskey and cigarettes lay. “Elmo is good to his little pet. But now, it is time for Elmo's pet to be good to Elmo.”

“Yes, Elmmmmm...” Constantine's words became muddled as Elmo thrust his cock back into Constantine's mouth.  
“Elmo wants Connie to finger himself.”

Constantine did not pause in slurping and sucking of Elmo's staff as he shoved one, then two fingers up his ass. He made sure to rub his chin often against Elmo's balls until Elmo pushed him away. Constantine's cock throbbed in time with his pounding heart.

“Elmo wants Connie to get on all fours.” Elmo grabbed the whip that had been tossed on the bed before climbing behind Constantine. He smacked the leather off of Constantine's ass a few times before sliding inside to Constantine's delighted moans.

“Oh, Elmo,” Constantine groaned. “Th-th-this is why I came here. Oh. Oh! You feel so-so-so good inside me. Oh, love, please fuck me harder. You are so much better than Kermit.”

Elmo paused. He slapped Constantine with the whip a few more times. “Don't ever mention that slimy bastard to Elmo. Elmo is a million times better than that toad could ever be. Elmo is the reason that Piggy is now a vegetarian.”

Sweat poured from Constantine's face. All he wanted was for Elmo to resume his pummeling until Constantine couldn't remember his name. “I'm sorry, cowboy. I'll never… I'll never mention him again. Just please – PLEASE – fuck me!”

“Hold on.” Elmo slammed back into him without warning. Elmo showed no mercy as he thrust against the man, his only concern reaching his own completion. Elmo felt the pressure build until he knew he was about to come. He yanked out suddenly and let loose all over Constantine's back. “It's magic, bitch!”

“Fuck yes, it is!” Constantine shouted as his own orgasm began; his cum hitting him in his own face. He collapsed on the bed.

Elmo sat back on his heel, a satisfied look gracing his features. “That's it; roll around in Elmo's stickiness. Let it absorb into Connie's skin. It will make Connie strong in Connie's fights.”

Constantine nodded, his eyes half-closed. “Thank you, Elmo.”

“Don't thank Elmo yet. Elmo is not done riding his little pet.” Elmo reached out and caressed Constantine's thigh. “But rest for now. Elmo's demon is going to need beaten later.”

**Author's Note:**

> My soul is going to need help after writing these.


End file.
